Hey beautiful people.
Well, ‘Where do I start?’ and ‘What do I start writing about?’ are two questions I keep asking myself (and I for one am the biggest over thinker!). I am awfully good at procrastinating, when I can’t decide what to do. Which is exactly what I’m currently doing. Instead of marking or dragging myself off to bed I came up with an idea. Of course painting at 10.30 on a school night is the most logical of options to take right now. So while my watercolours dry, I sit here and type…. It seems like the better of the options (although watching paint dry maybe someone’s thing!) and yes I’m still avoiding laying my head to rest or marking those books.
So I did a little reading … You’ll find that out about me. I like to know things. I typed in my search bar ‘How to make a blog?’ and a plethora of advice was laid across my screen but the main statement that stuck in my head was ‘write about something you’re interested in’. Instantly my mind whizzed and whirled. What would I dedicate my time to? Which interest would I choose ultimately above all the rest? I was stumped. Do I choose to blog about the daily life of a primary school teacher, about my beautiful black mare, or even the crazy workings of my cats!? Then I had an ember of hope, that I might write about my journey creating recipes and how it’s changed my world completely. Instantly, I felt guilty for not dairaizing my journey so far, wished I’d made notes and I almost gave up on myself and the idea completely .
Not only am I a professional over thinker, I also like things to be and look exactly how I want them to look. Some may say I can be a perfectionist or even say it’s slightly OCD. My friends at school will vouch for the insane workings of my mind. If I were to make my blog, then everything had to be on it before anyone saw it. Recipe pages, the images, the links and most importantly how it was designed. So alongside typing, I’ve begun choosing layouts, playing around with fonts and adding bizarre things called widgets, but my books are taunting me from across the table.
The huge workload of a teacher resulted in me pushing this idea to one side.
(While the blog and this post lay dormant)…
I had plucked up the courage to start a FB page ‘Emmy Creates’. Although, the moment I’d made it I wanted to take it down. I’m now glad the inner turmoil of self doubt that crept in ‘Who would listen to me and why would they want to? There’re already so many food blogs and pages out there, why would mine be any different?’ didn’t persist (okay, okay it did. I admit it) and it only rears its niggling head for short periods of time (honest), as I was able to share some of the meals I was making. I’d like to say that the food place I lived in before was certainly not the wholesome place I find myself now, so then maybe, just maybe my experimenting with recipes could inspire those close to me.
Amazingly, some lovely people have wanted to taste and make some of the yummies I was making. Amongst friends, I’ve shared a little but for quite a few months the idea of properly sharing ways to make healthy recipes has loomed overhead. It wasn’t until I was lying on my yoga mat this evening, it hit me, I knew what I actually wanted this blog to look and feel like (I think). For those who know me will already agree that I like to do many things and to not start my blog for all of the aforementioned doubts wouldn’t be me. So here I take the plunge and share my first post (I think that’s what it’s called).
I guess in scary moments like these we get the chance to thank any doubtful thoughts and send them on their way.